Life is good, but it can be better.
Recently turning 34, I feel somewhat strange about my place in the world and who am I. In some ways I feel 34 and in others I definitely do not. In some ways I’m where I’m meant to be, living as well as I’ve ever done. In others, I feel I’m woefully behind, deficient, underachieving or plainly just have it all wrong. I never imagined my life turning out the way it has currently, today. I never thought it would have been this difficult nor would I have struggled with it so much. Nevertheless, I have achieved much success and have it better than most so what’s there to complain about.
“People understand me so little that they do not even understand when I complain of being misunderstood.” – Soren Kierkegaard
What better way to convey some of my feelings, but in poetry. After all, the artist is the one who suffers whilst the masses go, “please suffer again soon.”
Is this the way?
Am I ahead of the curve or,
Way off course
A deer in the headlights
Will the car hit me or,
Will I move in time?
What is the tipping point?
The straw that breaks the camel’s back?
The point of no return?
The line in the sand?
You never think it’ll be you
Left with something to do
Making sense of nonsense
People resist getting better
“the right way” is past tense
Men and women suffer together
In sight of insight
The answers are coming
The weight I carry
The burden I bare
Is it really mine?
Have I brought it onto myself?
A self-imposed prison
Perhaps only conquered by “He Has Risen”
Where did the fun go?
Where did the laughter?
The basic enjoyments of life
Disappeared without a patter
Safety and security pursued
At the cost of life satisfaction
I am a complex character
As the people say
A simple yes or no
To that I say “nay!”
Much unhappiness
If you live my way
So why do you do it?
Why keep fighting?
Do you believe you’re fighting for something,
For more than your survival?
Can you tell me what it is?
Do you even know?
Because I choose to.
[Encore]
There has to be more (to life)
There’s got to be
An eternal love
To make the suffering worthwhile
A transcendental beauty
To revitalise the soul
You can find it in people
You can find it in music
You can find it in art
Open your eyes and heart
I’ll keep coming back to thee
For as long as you’ll have me
A complicated soul are you Martyn, too many deep thoughts at times. Life in general is not always easy and harder for some than others but nonetheless......life is a journey that we all must endure in our own way love. Maybe you might need to go off road to find your true calling? Your family will always be there to support you, no matter what. Love Mum X💚